Frowning Clown

His Face tends to look hypnotizing

with his wicked smile looks frightening.

His scream and laugh is freakingly odd,

and his lifeless eyes painted in his face badly.

Every time I go to sleep, my heart pound so deep.

I can't hide my fear and I feel he is near.

Trying to keep myself out of this confusion,

and hoping it will not cause traumatization.

Im being drowned in misunderstanding,

and sorrounded by mere illusion.

I realized there just hiding their own depression 

beneath their mask and their smile.

"SAD but now it's OK that my DADDY died"

When I was a kid, I get things I want easily like toys, clothes, food. I have a happy complete family, a good family that always take care of me but in my family I'm daddy's girl. When my only brother teased me and made me cry, I always run through my daddy's shoulder (not in my mommy cause I feel that time my daddy is much kinder than my mommy) and my daddy will carry me with a big hug and it comports me. When I woke up in the morning, the first thing I do is to go to my daddy's lap and we bath and eat together, he always ride me with his motorcycle to get in school, we do it every single day, I am totally close with my father. There's a time when my parents ask me "what if we got separated, who will you choose, your mommy or your daddy?" I straightly answered them "I would choose my daddy", my answer prove that I totally love my daddy.

But when I reached first grade, drastic event happen in my life that makes me deeply depressed, it was unexpected. Death is inevitable, my daddy died, it was so sad my tears won't stop from falling. I thought I can't recover from that incident but because I have a good and loving family, they help me to get out from darkness. After years passed, I realized I should not stick on one person to love with, look also into the other side of life, little by little I'm getting closer to my mommy, my love to my mommy is not the same as before, it becomes more deeper, wider and stronger. Now I cherished my mommy the most, that's the reason even it was so SAD but right now i'ts OK that my Daddy died.

(*even I have a very sad past, I'm still smiling for tomorrow life,*)

"What *Mama* means to me"

Mama is such a simple word

But there's a meaning when it heard

For everything I am today

My mama love showed me the way.

Mama shared my memorable days

Either bad or good ways

She's so strict but she feels me free

She's the best of all the best for me

And that's what the word "Mama" meant to me.

"Poems about RAIN"

1.)  A rain never expire
     But forever to inspire
     Feels like near by danger
     But it is just a stranger
     A sweet drop of the rain.


2:) Look up rather than down
    Smile rather than frown
    Shallows the dark of night
    But its feel right
    Like a rain who sounds crown.


3:  A rain of havoc crashing aloud
    Beginning to be a becloud
    The heaven is already crying
    For someone who is dying
   There is still a vivid after all.

"The Story of my Life"

September 8, 1996, the unexpected day, the signs in the heaven showed up. The God’s angel will come to earth to give peace and happiness. The life of one family will change for the coming angel in their lives.

The angel fall in the Combista family, the family who have strong family ties and have a strong faith to God. This family named the angel, ‘PAULA’ the female name of Paul, 
the honorable Saint Paul.   

The year passed, this angel live happy and strong little girl and she has a strong faith in God. But when she was 7 years old, the saddest thing on earth she ever encountered, it was all the sudden. Her father died not because of the accident or illness, her father died because of a nightmare.

 The little angel cry for miracles and for the power of resurrection but nothing happen. She almost lost faith in God but before that happen she realizes that this is reality, ‘Humans will die’. While we are still alive we should not waste it, as the saying says ‘Time is precious’ so live happy, live  with no regrets, live with all you got and die happy, to share and live back to the kingdom of God.

So the little angel back to her old self and accept the truth, she believes she always have her Dad in her heart. After her father died, she renew her mind and she focus on her studies and become honored student, she live for her family, her love ones, for herself and for God who gave her life.

Now she is grateful who she is and what she is, she holds her life and her dreams, and she always have a strong heart to face the challenges that God gives. Today, the angel lives happy in her heart, her mind and her soul, so the little angel becomes true angel and now she is ready to face the real world.

“Always trust God in all the challenges in life, don’t lose hope”. “MAY GOD BE WITH US”

Life is....

Some people say life is sucks
While others say life is wonderful
Whatever its is, life is for everyone
A life we borrow, life we share


Life is easy to get, easier to lose
Easy to think but hard to do
Life is about learnings
and challenge to do


Life is all about you
about how you treat it
about how you embrace it
about how you love it and accept it


If you love life, its good
If you hate life, its your choice
You like it or hate it
Well its up to you
Life is you, so be careful how you describe it :)

Which can only be the "best" of all

IN MY LIFE THERE'S ONLY ONE WOMAN
SHE SEEMS FULL OF PASSION
A PASSION THAT PULLS ME TO DETERMINATION
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL

FOR ALL THE SACRIFICES SHE ENDOU'
FOR ALL THE COMFORT SHE PURSUE
FOR ALL THE CARE SHE SHARED
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL

FROM HEAD TO TOE SHE KNOWS ME
FROM PHYSICAL TO EMOTIONAL SHE IDENTIFIES
FROM DAY TO NIGHT SHE'S ALWAYS THERE
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL

SHE'S MY ONE AND ONLY
SHE'S MY ONE AND NO ONE ELSE
SHE'S MY ONE AND EVERYTHING
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL

THE SMILE I SHOW I HAVE THE REASON
THE TEARS I CRY I HAVE THE COMFORT
THE DARKNESS I'D FIGHT I HAVE THE LIGHT
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL

I CHERISH HER FOR ALL THROUGHOUT MY LIFE
I HAVE IN MY HEART TO LOVE IN MY LIFE
I LOVE AND DO CARE FOR ALL MY LIFE
I CALL HER MY "BEST MOM" FOREVER
WHICH CAN ONLY BE THE BEST OF ALL